Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Travel tip

If the airport you're leaving from has a decent duty free section, go in and find the most expensive face moisturizer that has a tester available, and discreetly slather your face in it.
That one that's made out of, like, stem cells & lamb DNA should work, but the one I used was an some kind of organic, plant-based, thin greenish goo.
My face was still baby-soft, like, 26 hours and 3 planes later. Usually I get so dried out I look flaky as hell and wrinkled like a dried apricot.


What's your best travel tip?

29 comments:

BeckEye said...

I just like to slaughter a live lamb and then stick my face inside its body cavity and rub it around in the blood and guts. It keeps me looking 10 years younger.

Hunter said...

Noise-canceling headphones are a must! It's amazing how much of your energy gets zapped by the roar of jet engines.

Thanks for the tip. I never feel pretty after long distance plane rides.

Eric said...

Flotation devices are located in the armrests (or under seat).

Don't use the blankets / pillows, gross germs.

If going overseas, to avoid illnesses you might catch by breathing other people's air on the plane for 11 hours, either drink whiskey heavily or get a preemptive prescription of antibiotics.

FunnyGal KAT said...

This is timely because I just got home from a trip two days ago. My tip is to bring food in your carry on. Whether you need a snack in the airport or don't want to pay $5 for a bag of potato chips on the plane, you'll be set.

Mr. Condescending said...

I'm not slathering any lotion on my face! Good tip for girls though.

SkylersDad said...

My best tip is to not bathe for a couple of days prior to the flight, then dress like a flood victim while drooling down my shirt. I almost always get a row to myself, excelsior!

Trinity said...

Well, I would recommend never forgetting your ear buds or you will be sorry.

kate sweeten said...

I used to work for an airline, so I've got all kinds of sneaky travel tips. The best one, though? Courtesty coupons - they're good for free headphones and booze on your flight (and, honestly, if you can get free booze, what's the need for headphones). All you really have to do ask an agent if they had any extras - most airlines are pretty liberal about handing them out (especially if your flight is delayed). Sometimes a free $5 can of beer is just what it takes to perk up an otherwise blah flight :)

Simon Butler said...

When the stewardess asks if anyone knows how to fly a plane, resist the temptation to hold your hand up.

words...words...words... said...

My best travel tip is one word.

Drive.

Anonymous said...

Take a face-washer (do Americans call it a flannel? Whatever. One of those small squares of towel material you can use to wash your face.) That way you can scrub the recycled air grime off your face periodically and feel slightly less contaminated by the yuck of long-haul flights.

I do hope you are having a wonderful time wherever you've landed (somewhere south, I hope!) I will try to keep my envy under wraps, you jetsetting hot-shot, you.

Soda and Candy said...

Wow, you guys love giving advice huh? ; )

BeckEye - So that's your secret. *puts lamb on the shopping list*

Hunter - Yeah, that and I wouldn't hear the braying jackass in the seat behind me.

Eric - Don't they throw away the pillows and blankets after each trip though?

FunnyGal KAT - Yeah, but if you're smarter than me, your carry-on food won't contain mayonnaise and won't have been in the trunk of your car for oh, THREE HOURS before you took it on a plane.

Mr C - Come on, don't you need to protect your boyish handsomeness?

Skydad - Heheheehehe, excelsior!

Trinity - I hate those airline earbuds, they are too big for my dainty lady-like ears.

Kate - Where were you BEFORE I went away? That is the best tip ever! So is that like, something you can ask for when you check in, or when?

Simon - That is definitely sage advice, sir. Is that the voice of experience? ; )

WWW - What if it's a whole other continent on the other side of the planet?

Auburnette - Ooh good one. They used to give you those nice hot towels, now it's crappy little moist towelettes which I suspect are more drying than just air even.

Scope said...

My travel tip? Netbook instead of full sized laptop. Fits on the little trays and everything. Plus decent battery life.

Otherwise, I would have to use real cards to play Free Cell and I would certainly drop the 8 of clubs on the floor and be totally SCREWED the rest of the flight.

Soda and Candy said...

Scope - Heh, I can imagine the cards flying all over the place!

Anonymous said...

My travel trip: Don't.

Soda and Candy said...

Well Fed - It keeps things simple!

Madame DeFarge said...

I long to travel, but seem tied to my desk, pressing my little nose up against the window of life. So sad.

Soda and Candy said...

Madame DeF - Awww, like a cute little puppy that is very good at blogging!

Farnnay said...

I dont travel. I traveled like once.

My best travel tip: TRAVEL!

Soda and Candy said...

CA - IF you want to, you should! Even just a day trip somewhere in the car can feel like a mini-holiday.

mo.stoneskin said...

So that's the moisturiser I bought had clearly been used? Dammit.

Soda and Candy said...

Mo - Hahahahaa! Sorry!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

oh hey....thats a seriouly good tip.

thanks

Post Grad Hair Cut said...

I don't fly often enough to have advice, but I have to say I'll do this next time! (I just hope they have the lamb DNA moisturizer)

Soda and Candy said...

Candy - Probably a make-up maven like you already owns good moisturizer but hey, free is always good right?

Post-Grad - Welcome! Me either really, I shall probably forget by the next time! ; )

Anonymous said...

My best travel tip is to travel with a big dude who can easily part crowds in airports. Time saver, let me tell ya.

Soda and Candy said...

Tishtasha - Yes! Or at least a large backpack that can be swung around menacingly. In combination with pointy elbows.

Cora said...

Just don't board the flight with the lady who is destined to have a medical emergency 20 minutes after take-off and which will result in your being stranded in Omaha all night. That's my only travel advice.

Soda and Candy said...

Oh Cora, that would SUCK!