Bo-ring. Do another one about funny Aussie words!

I sometimes think about the secret inner life of humans, and bloggers in particular.

We share our most intimate and true thoughts, feelings and experiences with each other, and yet for the most part we don't really know each other at all.

Anyone walking down the street could be a blogger. Not just that but a blogger you've read. The chick who just sold you your venti Americano could be the most hilarious writer you'll ever read. The guy who fixes your computer could be a sweet, romantic soul. That soccer mom who jogs around your block every morning could be sharing the saucy details of her sex life or exploiting her children for humorous purposes. The dude you just bought stamps from might be a skilled photographer or a talented poet.

On the other side of the coin, you will be aware of the physical appearance of some bloggers whereas others prefer to keep their real identity extremely secret. Sometimes you will have been reading a blog for some time, and have formed a mental image of the person based on their writing - only to find out when they post a photo that your assumptions were startlingly inaccurate.

You cannot know what is in someone's soul on first acquaintance. As much as I love judging people*, being involved in blogging reminds me to be less judgmental of my fellow humans, because I have been invited inside people's private thoughts and been surprised at the depth and complexity of so many of you. Not to mention your intelligence and capacity to make me laugh (and cry, and sigh).

What's the point of this story? You guys rock. And don't let the real world tell you any different, because they don't know you like I do.


*It's kind of a hobby.

Original Drafts VIII

Song requested by: the girl with the pink teacup.

Soda Fountain of Knowledge (Language Edition): Fun Size Aussie Words

Strewth*! It's been a while since I've done a Soda Fountain of Knowledge post! Here is a collection of Aussie words, very typical in that they are merely shortened forms of existing words - I guess it's too bloody hot to say long words.

hanky: n. handkerchief
As in "Don't put that disgusting used hanky back in your pocket!"

nightie: n. nightgown
As in "I couldn't sleep last night, I was up & down like a bride's nightie!"

chewy: n. chewing gum
As in "Got any chewy, mate?"

ciggie: n. cigarette
As in "Strewth, I need to cut back on the ciggies."


On a side note, why do we ask to borrow cigarettes and tissues and things like that? If you "borrow" a tissue from me, there's no way in hell I'm letting you return it.


*Strewth is an Aussie exclamation that I believe the whitefellas imported from Britain. It comes from a much older oath, God's truth! Similarly, Zounds! comes from God's wounds!

Original Drafts VII

Song requested by: Words... words... words.

Fun Size Over to You: Avataristic

Happy Fourth of July to all my American readers!
And Happy Saturday to everyone else : )

I guess not many of you will be reading today so here's a quick thought for the weekend:

If I were a cartoon character, I would be either Hello Kitty or one of those schoolgirls from Neon Genesis Evangelion.

I mean, you can't go wrong with cute Japanese schoolgirls who can control massive violent robots, amiright? I pretty much already have the almost-crying giant wobbly eyes thing down, and I'm pretty sure dark pink ovals appear on my cheeks when I'm embarrassed.

If you were a cartoon character, who would you be and why?

Something fishy and fun

You guys, you have to go to Goldfish Broth right now! and play the word verification definition game.

I know it's been done before, but it's always so much fun!!! Plus, read his own post of w/v definitions before you go and you will realize just how high a standard you will be held to in G. Henry's arena. Anyone who uses the word paucity correctly in a blog post deserves as many readers as can be shepherded his way.

...Again with the pimping?

Yes. Because even though there's a high likelihood that pointing my readers towards blogs which are infinitely funnier than mine will only result in an even sadder comment count for me, I must share this with you.

That's how much of a saint I am.

UPDATE: It's official, I'm going to be designing an award for the winner!!!

Entry into Heaven = guaranteed *dusts hands off smugly*.

I win! I win!

So y'all remember that I won a prize from my blog homeboy Joshlos.

Well he made an awesome post about sending it, and it has arrived at Candysoda Castle, so I thought I'd post about it too just to make y'all jealous!

Here is a photo of my delicious bounty along with a note from Jam Master Josh himself (click to embiggen):

3x king size Snickers Almond bars, which were 2 piece at the start of their journey but as you can see having encountered what must be at least 150º Fahrenheit* on arrival in the dirty dirty** arrived in pulpy, almost-liquid form.
Thankfully they reconstituted quite well - although it takes 20 minutes to unwrap one - and taste like heaven.

2x 14 ounce bags of Skittles, which due to my unfamiliarity with your crazy imperial system I keep referring to as 14 pound bags. I took a bag to the office and now everyone keeps coming to visit me and my bowl of Skittles.
Lesson? Sugar = popularity.

AND Josh made me an award. Which I heart bigtime (and only adjusted the colors a little to fit my bloggy decor):




*As far as I know I'm not exaggerating... am still getting the hang of Fahrenheit, but it is bloody boiling here.

**I'm pretty much a hardcore gangsta. For those of you who aren't, the dirty dirty = Southern states of the USA.